Where have all the socks gone????

Where have all the bobbysocks gone?? (think in the tune of the song...where have all the cowboys gone?) How hard is it to keep the socks together? You put two on, one for each foot. You take two off, one for each foot. You put two in the laundry basket...assuming you use a laundry basket...you should be putting two in the wash, and then two in the dryer...RIGHT???? Simple enough. Then how come two don't come out????????????
This is a disturbing question for me after a twenty minute search for missing socks. I've confirmed that there isn't a black hole in my washer, I've confirmed that there isn't a sock monster (cookie monsters cousin) in my dryer. (oh and on a side note...I ventured into the teenagers room in this quest.....I'm seeing RED!!!)
Now I really can't complain about the laundry....cause I don't do it....I SUCK at it...I mean REALLY SUCK at it. So my poor hubby does it. Now don't get me wrong, I can do it...I can get in the wash and on a good day, I can remember to get it into the dryer...and EVEN BETTER day, I can get it out of the dryer...it's a freaking red letter day if I do all that AND put it away! :) Now the part that I have a problem with is the fact that it's not folded like I like, but I shut up, cause I KNOW...he's told me this before, if I don't like it, then I can do it myself...nicely of course. My poor family would be screwed if that ever happens...trust me I know cause it has happened.
Now, I have small feet...I have an 8 year old son and a 16 year old daughter...socks can get messed up. My daughter doesn't mind...it adds to her amount, my son on the other hand...."DAAAAAAAAAAADDDDDDDDDDD THESE ARE NOT MY SOCKS!!!!!!!!!!!! Ooops!
They are easy to miss assign to the wrong person...it happens, BUT HOW is it possible for one of these socks to go completely missing?????
I keep asking myself this question....and since no one is home right now, I get to talk to myself.....nothing weird about that...that is except for the fact that when I answer myself...it's in the voice of Srgt. Friday.....????????????? We'll figure that one out at another time....:)
WHY are there four different piles of mismatched socks? I don't know Ma'am. Oh look, I just matched four pair. Good for you Ma'am. Why is it so hard to do. I don't know Ma'am, but the mistress of the Plantation can't do it, so it's left up to the Court Jester (that's right! I called myself the mistress of a Plantation...cause in my head I'm the mistress of a great plantation...an equal opportunity plantation, but a good ole southern belle plantation mistress I am...yeah I'm crazy!) Why does the Court Jester do the laundry? The Mistress would go into palpitations if she had to do it, Ma'am. But the Court Jester??? Yes, Ma'am. Oh my! It's not so bad, ma'am, when the sheets get washed we find more socks. WHAT????Yes ma'am, we find socks in the dirty sheets, and then when we change the sheets, we find clean socks in them. Our missing sock pile will drop dramatically, ma'am. It' would help, ma'am, if the mistress would change the sheets more often, but we don't complain. Oh that is just gross!!! Yes ma'am it is, but we don't talk about it.

Are ya getting a good picture of the inner workings of my mind yet??? If nice young men in white coats show up on my door step...I'll know it was YOU that called them....haha!
So here I am, with a pile of miss matched socks....wondering .....Where have all the bobbysocks gone???? (your going to have this tune in your mind for the rest of the day!!!!!!!!!!! hahah...evil laugh!!